


When is a Monster Not a Monster

by Northisnotup



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Episode: s01e16-17 Peter Nureyev and the Angel of Brahma, Introspection, M/M, Other, POV Peter Nureyev, Telepathy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23537518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Northisnotup/pseuds/Northisnotup
Summary: For the prompt: "I'm Worried About You."
Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Comments: 4
Kudos: 76





	When is a Monster Not a Monster

**Author's Note:**

> Prompted by neveranygoodupthere on tumblr. Turns out I have a lot to say about what Peter was doing while Juno read his mind.

Intellectually, Nureyev knows that Juno’s been reading his mind these last few days. That he’s been reading minds since he took that damned pill more than a month ago. That the purpose of Miasma’s torture and games is to hone that ability, presumably so that she may replicate it, and that at his own invitation, Juno is reading his mind right now. It would be easier to remember if the act felt like anything at all. 

There is no feeling of invasion. He cannot feel Juno’s surely unsubtle ransaking of the carefully filed compartments of his mind. In actuality, he has no way of knowing exactly what Juno is seeing in the recesses of his memory. Oh, Nureyev could guess. He has, after all, a rather lengthy resume of high class crime dating back over ten years, and a laundry list of lower misdemeanors longer than he is tall. 

And those are all impressive stories that have added to his mystique, his legend, his Brand as a thief. 

None of them are what Juno will be looking for. 

Juno whimpers, his thick brows drawing together and body twitching in Nureyev’s lap as if in distress.

“Juno?” Nureyev can’t help but whisper, a prayer to the goddess bleeding for him. He runs a gentle thumb underneath Juno’s eye, smearing the sticky ichor welling there.

He doesn’t wake. Instead his plush lips begin to form a name that sends a chill down Nureyev’s spine, even after almost twenty years. No, what Juno's seeking is the hollow core of what Peter Nureyev is. The inciting incident that made his name his most precious commodity, and that made him a monster without one. 

Years ago, Nureyev acted as a muse for one of the galaxy’s 'most promising up and coming artist.' In actuality, just a very rich heir to a very sizable fortune who had decided to dabble in the arts. Ken was a simpering narcissist and a horridly selfish lover, but he did have talent, and when Nureyev left him, he left with more than just riches. 

“When is monster, not a monster?” Ken asked, trailing cold fingers down Nureyev’s spine. At the time, Nureyev thought the answer he gave was trite, simplistic, and a little reductive, given that while he was captivated with Nureyev, he was honest and openly not in love with him.

Now, with Juno cradled in his arms staring sightlessly forward, lost in Nureyev’s memories and blood creating messy streams down his face, Nureyev thinks he can finally understand where Ken was coming from. 

A sob wrenches out of Juno’s throat and he lurches in Nureyev’s grasp. 

“Juno?!”

The blood that began as a trickle is now running down his face as though his eye is an open wound. 

“Juno,” Nureyev feels helpless, as he has ever since realizing what Miasma’s plan was. His goddess likely cannot hear him, but he whispers anyway, hands fluttering uselessly around the face twisted in pain. “Juno, I’m worried about you, please wake up!” 

He convulses again, his gorgeous, bloodshot eyes rolling. 

“Juno! Someone, come help, quick!” 

“No, he, what?” Juno slurs, twisting against the grip Nureyev has on his arms. 

“He’s bleeding! If you don’t come in here this instant he’ll die, do you hear me, and then where will you be?” 

Juno is in no shape to follow through with this plan. But it is a plan and Nureyev is sick of being helpless. 

When is a monster not a monster, Ken had asked. 

When the monster loves you.


End file.
